The making of the Lost Brother

Let me just first clear up the accusations and assumptions the premise of the lost brother was to signify losing who my brother once was before taking the drugs not necessarily death. During the making of The Lost Brother, I made heavy references to Euphoria, an adaptation of the original Euphoria series. This particular series, which I had referred to, was made in 2019 and starred Zendaya. Many of the themes that the series touches on are what I had experienced during that time in my life.

My approach for the making of The Lost Brother was to make the viewer feel as if they were me in the situation this was purposefully done in order to help the viewer engage and relate to the content whether they had experienced it or not there was a level of sympathy and hurt that I wanted to send across to my viewers.The Lost Brother shows a certain amount of intense scenes and uncomfortable scenes that would not make a person want to walk away from but would also make the viewer uncomfortable with how honest and relatable whatever way the content is to the viewer.

There are a lot of zoom-in and split shots in order for the viewer to see two perspectives and two thought processes of what I had been going through. I had chosen the poetic approach for reasons that integrate into my reality being that some things are just hard to say to the person therefore by making it metaphoric I sent a message across without using the words that I had already voiced to my brother before.

And I feel poetry just sums up a lot of feelings and emotions within two lines then explains within a whole paragraph how one feelsThe plotline for the lost brother is surrounded by an idea that I am looking for him as you can see towards the end of the video you could see I following the male figure into an abyss throughout I am yearning for that brotherly attention and love that is occupied by the drugs.

The idea behind the man behind the flame or the shadow behind the flame is self-explanatory I would see him behind the flame light lighting a joint or whatever it may be hence the use of a lot of shadows and a play on the shadows in the video as well as the lighting being warm to signify a flame.The poem itself or this piece may seem deep but it’s quite self-explanatory with regards to the topic it highlights one would be able to understand the premise of what is being discussed and that was done purposefully so that the message should be understood and not self interpreted so anyone could relate to either the situation at hand being drug abuse or the simple divide that siblings may undergo.

This was a dark and quite exposing peace and was kind of an outlet for me to express hidden feelings towards my brother and is quite jarring but it does not let off all hope for my brother as I mention that it isn’t the end of his story so an update on how he is now is quite better and ironic enough it was a phase in reference to the poem it was a phase that I’m so glad it’s over and he is doing much better now so we thank God.Now that the meaning of the lost Brother is aside the actual making of the lost Brother was quite a fun experience ironically enough as my team had a lot of fun with experimentation by using my vision for what I wanted we were able to explore different types of shooting styles and a play on lighting as well as movement and some of the scenes and my coast was so much fun to work with as he added a lot of great creative input and together as well as my team we were able to create something beautifully sad.

To reflect on whether I moved on from what had happened would be to kind of open up a scabbed wound in a sense and with this piece of work I did do exactly that and also made me realised that I did not quite move on,instead suppressed that emotion and phase of my life so deep into my subconscious that by speaking about it, it made me realise how much damage it caused to my family and I. How do I feel now?. I would say I am properly healing now that he is doing better. I realised that this was a universal situation  through one member of the audience being touched by my peace to a point of them crying in a sense it was sad but also comforted by the fact that  I am not alone in this, and that it’s heartbreaking that so many other people go through this on a day-to-day basis but should stay hopeful and prayerful that they will be a silver lining at the end of the tunnel. I will do better I will feel better as that’s what time does but it had taught me that healing is not a step but a journey that’s long, exhausting, and somewhat painful but it is also attainable. 

I am Malaika Nkechinyere Ntuli  and this was my story.

Script

"A Brother Lost"

 

-monologue-

 

Music| I’m Tired- Labarith

 

Malaika- stands face forward in front of the camera (looking straight into the lens)

{no facial expression}

Shot cuts to…

Male Figure- stands face forward in front of the camera (looking straight into the lens) 

{close up shot to wide shot}

 

[Taking place in a warm lit room]

Sfx: camera sound effects

 

In 2021, the estimated number of illegal drug users worldwide was around 296 million. Overall, and in the past couple of years in South Africa, of the many drug use candidates 4.4%, 7.9% are among men.

And the 0.0001 percentage shares my surname

 

(Camera follows the male figure while the walks through a field/ wilderness/ outdoors)

{semi wide shot Level shot}

 

It felt almost like a dream 

To what I thought it seemed 

 

(Camera cuts to Malaika and the male figure in a dark room with a single flare of a candle light to light up the up the room |semi close up shot)

 

From a young adventurous soul 

To something I almost couldn't behold

 

The color of life you painted so bright 

All darken that one night 

 

(Camera cuts to Malaika and the male figure in a dark room with a single flare of a candle light to light up the up the room| semi close up shot)

{slip camera screen of a front view and alternating from extreme wide lower two shot of both the Male figure and Malaika on a couch}

(wide to close up shot)

 

It started with the secrets you made me tell

illusioned by the many times you said it will be well

 

Malaika and the male figure sit on a couch while he whispers in me my ear)

{Camera zooms from a wide shot to close up shot with transitions in between each frame}  

 

Letting that flame Ingulf you gradually

Thinking this made you happy, I let you use me, but eventually 

(split screen shot of Malaika and male figure looking away from camera)

{Top semi wide shot}

 

You betrayed me time and time again, each worse than the last

Picking out a piece of my trust with every puff and stuff, but i left that all in the past 

 

But what leaves me broken is having seen a soul shine so bright 

Become a shadow to a flame that burn almost every night 

 

(shot cuts to Malaika embracing the male figure in a hug |close up shot)

 

But its normal right as they say, it's not that serious they say, 

Heck you will even burn that flame one day  

 

(Malaika on the room floor with color alternating color front view| wide to close up shot)

 

So i also brushed it away and accepted the new reality 

Not knowing its fatality 

 

Malaika in a room where the male figure is banging on the door)

Sfx: banging on door sounds 

 

The man behind the flame grew rageful

And honestly it was just distasteful 

 

You prance leaving a trail of destruction

Causing the household to malfunction

 

(Camera cut the male figure in the outdoors| close up shot)

Sfx: nature sounds

 

With every syllable you spoke being lies 

We gathered around those words like flies 

 

(The male figure whispers to Malaika on a couch)

 

{split screen shot of the Malaika and male figure in to separate stills}  

 

In hopes that you would believe them enough to become them 

Unknowing that we had since lost that gem 

 

Pulling the strings of my mother’s heart

To her unconditional love you pierced a drat

 

(cuts back to Malaika and male figure standing in the outdoor/ in the wilderness| wide to close up shot)

 

For this I could not

there, you lost the plot 

 

From the beast that you fed

You turn around and dread

 

(Camera cuts to Malaika and the male figure’s shadow getting in to a altercation)

{side close up shot}

 

Enough of this I could not heed

As you made all our hearts to bleed

 

So, fought the shadow man behind flame

Having him tower over me like a great Dane 

 

To which I threw my first blow 

To him it was a no show 

 

(cuts to Malaika watching the male figure walking away)

(cuts to Malaika sitting on the couch alone)

{transitions within the shot showing the male walks away}

 

Again, I beat on his chest 

Sobbing just put this to rest 

 

We need you to the head

But you disappoint us instead 

 

(cut Malaika watching the male figure walking away)

(cuts to Malaika standing alone in a room)

{transitions within the shot showing the male walking away}

Sfx: nature sounds

 

 

Oh how i miss your beautiful light 

Could it come it back and make all things right 

 

And with cold, hollow glare 

You just stare

 

(cuts to Malaika watching the male figure walking away in the outdoors)

{wide shot}

Sfx: nature sounds

 

You turned your back 

 And took flight

 

The lost Bother, but this isn't the end of his story 

 

(cuts to Malaika and the male figure greeting each other in the outdoors | wide shot)

 

(show a picture of my brother)

 

The end.

Spirit Animal

For centuries we have always been compared to wild life as we have also had a fascination with their unique but simple way of life and in a weird way we as humans related to them weather it be with the stars in astrology or within ancient tales and myths, we have always been connected to the animal species. A fox, often misunderstood to be a sly slick species. That's the animal I got after doing my personalities test, did you know that foxes... are not really flamboyant, and prefer being in an inconspicuous and small cozy house that is organized and neat.  They are closely related to dogs and jackals; they are skilled at staying out of sight although they sometimes fall pray to coyotes and wolves. Fox's are known to be very loyal, passionate and are creative. They are often largely misunderstood of being shy and retreating in nature but are actually using that as a survival strategy as it cannot succeed with brute force. They are very much fussy eaters and have an appreciation for the finer things in life. They demand quality entertainment, food and friends. They are not one to shy away from a little competition and are very ambitious. 

Yah.. I'm just curious as to how these personality test are so accurate and how does the behavior of an animal connect to a person and it makes me beck to question are animals more human than humans, like during the process of our evolution the properties that make humans human have slowly depreciated, From our interactions to the crimes committed. Have our sense of moral deteriorated or are we becoming less human.

What is creativity

 Creativity the trait that dowels in all of us, as on a day to day bases we are promote to be creative in our individual areas of living. Creativity is the ability to discover new and original ideas, connections and solutions to problems. As Humans creativity is the driving force of fostering resilience, to spark joy and it provides opportunities for self- actualization. 

Can creativity influence your thinking style, yes.. Divergent thinking, convergent thinking, real time creativity and multistage creativity all are the different ways people think creatively, i am more of a divergent kind of thinker, which is the intellectual capability to conger various original and different and well thought out ides.

During the our creativity and problem solving class we learnt that creativity can be measured as form intelligence and that some problem don't necessarily need a high IQ but just creativity. creativity has evolved through out history within humans forcing us to adapt and adjust to environments, conditions tends that come about.  

Originality involves creating something unique, while imagination involves envisioning and conceptualizing ideas that are not immediately tangible. Flexibility involves diverse thinking and adapting ideas as needed. Innovation involves applying creative ideas in practical ways, leading to improvements or breakthroughs. Expression involves expressing ideas through various mediums. Creativity can be nurtured through practice, collaboration, and an open-minded approach to exploring new perspectives.

Gender Codes

She belongs in the kitchen, you are built like a woman, he wears the pants in the relationship, pink is for girls and blue is for boys, and you throw like a girl, these sound familiar? either one of these must have been said to you or you may have used it to further your point. Gender Codes, the assigning specific traits or behaviors primarily or exclusively to a certain gender. Dominate, driven, and challenging are codes usually associated with masculine figures, while  loyal, understanding, and encouraging are typically associated with feminine figures, trust me once I finally knew the meaning of this concept I couldn't unsee it. It is engraved into our way of living from advertisements to our daily interactions with people. the impact of gender coding are stereotypical ideas and can effect an individual's preferred way they would want to be addressed.During our lesson in Creative and problem solving we addressed various topics associated with code and gender, and dove into the feminine touch that  typically refers to qualities or characteristics often associated with femininity that are perceived as nurturing, compassionate, intuitive, and sensitive. The  male gaze, posture, and infantilization; the process of treating an individual as if they are much younger than their actual age, typically in a condescending manner. This can involve actions, behaviors, or attitudes that undermine a person's autonomy, maturity, and capacity to make decisions for themselves. The above mentioned is just the tip of the ice burg of what was spoken about, but over all it was an informative lesson. 

Candyman 2021 Reboot

The 2021 horror movie "Candyman" was produced and directed by Jordan Peele and Nia DaCosta. The movie is a continuation of the 1992 original "Candyman" movie. In this adaptation, the narrative centers on Anthony McCoy, an artist who, while investigating Chicago's gentrified Cabrini-Green area, develops an obsession with the Candyman mythology. As Anthony explores the Candyman's sinister past, he unintentionally summons the spirit which leads to a sequence of terrifying incidents that bring the Candyman's vengeful soul back to life. The movie looks at issues like urban legends and racial injustice and highlights themes such as reincarnation, generational trauma and denial. During the lesson we found that the movie is a metaphor for the real-life events that have taken place in history and current events and that it is a ruthless cycle of violence, anger manipulation and lies. Matching almost perfectly to a story that took the world by storm, the George Flyod incident where a man was killed in cold blood by the hands of police brutality and it is shown in the movie where there is a scene where Anthony was shot at and killed without valid reason. But in the end was able to avenge himself and those who died before him by killing the policemen and leaving a message to his wife in the form of the 1992 Candyman, to tell everyone of the continuous surge of injustice against black people throughout history.

If the world was upside down

Have you ever thought about what if the world turned upside down? and weather we would be walking with our hands like a well-trained dog in the circus or we would be walking on roofs like in that  one trippy house in the Northwest, there are too many possibilities. but why speak about this you may be thinking, well during Mr. Mark's class we had to draw a portrait upside down without the use of a grid which was very mentally straining and a lot bit odd as the portrait itself did not make sense never the less my world turned upside down during that lesson. Things got restless when people started to turn their drawings upright to check their progress and it was utter chaos; with people having to start again or with people giving up, all the while trying to figure out who this portrait actually looked like.We had drawn the infamous Igor Stravinsky portrait by Pablo Picasso, and an artist by the name of Betty Edwards found when drawing this portrait upside down is a an interesing and confusing exercise.

The goal for this lesson was to see the way in which we interpret shape and lines and weather we change the look of a landscape and reference based on our own understanding or interpretation of a subject matter. We drew this portrait as accurately as possible disregarding our individual art style in order to capture the true essence of the shapes and lines in the original drawing. 

Overall a very interesting and fun exercise that really tested, improved and stretched our drawing capabilities. 

Code of Gender

 Assigning specific traits or behaviors exclusively to a certain gender, the cultural ideas of how a specific gender is supposed to behave based on stereotypes. Code of gender is a topic of discussion that has sat on our tongues since the break of dawn. Male, females, everything in between and outside of those codes and what that means. A classic story associated with this infamous topic is the biblical text based on the beginning of time and our creation; the story of Adam and Eve, - like many other biblical stories it describes the role of a male and female in society, but  outside of religion as humans, we have evolved from the once known and practiced stereotypes and we rebuilt  the meaning of Gender codes in society. For one being an educated female in the past was considered taboo and unacceptable but now it is considered a valuable addition to a woman's worth, but i  think at the heart of it, these changes were made because a man deemed it acceptable. During our class with Ma'am Tebogo, we highlighted some very interesting conversations such as how we live in a man's world and the male gaze and how there is a sick notion of what masculinity looks like and what it poses on women and their Femininity. A lot of back and forth was made but there was a subtle conclusion that was made as well, that without  context could seem a little far fetched. Absent fathers in households, and  this is not a recent occurrence but it dates all the way back to the apartheid regime and even back to slavery, it was a strategic notion to separate fathers from their families to create unstable households within black communities thus in some way weakening them as an alliance to the oppressors. We saw this when a point was made where ma'am asked us how many of us live in a home where there are both married parents in the same household and an unsettling amount of hands were down.